Horror Queen

I apologize in advance.

PLOT

Two college guys meet up with three female friends so they can head off for an island rave in the middle of nowhere. Karma likes Simon, but he’s obsessed with Alicia who isn’t yet over her ex and the other two friends (Cynthia and Greg) are dating. They miss the main boat, but convince a burly captain and his first mate Clint Howard to take them off. A cop follows them because she knows the captain is smuggling. The island is in horrible shape and everyone is missing, but they decide to stick around. After Cynthia gets eaten, the rest of the group catch up to three survivors of the rave, who saw the original zombie attack. Rudy is the leader of the group and conveniently Alicia’s ex. The little group decide to band together and fight the zombies in the hopes of getting off the island.

TRIVIA

Based on the game House of the Dead and produced by Sega, which pops up frequently in the movie.

Directed by Uwe Boll, well known for making lame horror movies based on video games.

THOUGHTS

I originally saw House of the Dead when it first came out on DVD and liked it enough to buy a copy. It was pretty lame, but in a good, fun way. When I found out that my boyfriend loved the games and had never seen the movie, I made him watch the whole thing and then felt bad about it. This time around it just felt like a bad horror movie. Jonathon Cherry who also appeared in Final Destination 2 is pretty good as Rudy and Simon isn’t too bad either, but the rest of the cast is pretty lacking in the talent department (not Clint Howard of course). The only real reason to watch it now is for Erica Durance who now appears on “Smallville” in one of her earliest roles.

Not too bad.

PLOT

The British Army rolls through a small town doing everything you’d expect from a zombie flick before the movie starts its different parts. A group of news people head to the country in the hopes of finding information relating to a deadly virus sweeping England. The rest of the movie relates to different groups of people and how they survive the outbreak, such as the survivors who shoot the infected without a second thought, children included. Slowly the movie reveals what happened to the original people and how the greater threat might not be the infected.

TRIVIA

Shot entirely on handheld video.

Released in America by Dimension Extreme.

THOUGHTS

Wal-Mart got me early this year because I found this one relatively cheap on their shelves and bought it without knowing anything about it. The shooting quality had me cringing at first, but as I got caught up in the story, I stopped noticing it. This is one of those great little horror movies that keep you thinking for a few days later, especially when the people experience more trouble and violence from other survivors than the infected zombies. If you haven’t seen Zombie Diaries, I recommend it, but I probably wouldn’t buy a copy unless you find it really cheap.

Finally saw it…

PLOT

When zombies take over the world, the government recruit’s a group of soldiers known as the zombie squad to handle the problems. At the same time a group of scientists are working on a cure for the zombie problem. The zombie squad quickly encounters a group of religious zealots who believe that God wants them to take care of the zombies and protect them. Their belief in part relies on the fact that the son of their leader was infected. They put up a fight when it comes to the zombie squad and aren’t about to take anything lying down.

TRIVIA

Sam Rami used some of his money from Evil Dead 2 to help produce the movie, using the name The Master Cylinder. Dead star Bruce Campbell helped out by dubbing two voices in the movie.

The movie is often billed as the most expensive Super-8 movie ever made.

THOUGHTS

I had The Dead Next Door in my instant queue on Netflix for what seemed like months (and probably was even longer). Every time I clicked through it, I took one look and kept moving. I finally forced myself to sit down and watch the whole thing the other night and the best I can say is that the movie is kind of okay. I’m not going to lie, this is truly low budget and for some people that’s why it works so well. I’m a different kind of movie watcher and for a budget like this to catch my attention, it needs to do something big and this one just didn’t cut it for me.

Another one that I really liked.

PLOT

David Murch goes on television to talk up the current President, who’s running for reelection in the middle of a fairly bad war. Jane Cleaver, a writer and outspoken woman jumps all over him. A guest calls in and tells him about losing her son in the current war. Murch tells the woman about how he lost his own brother in Vietnam and tells her that he wishes her son and all the fallen sons could come back. Murch and Cleaver embark on a sexual relationship, but that all falls apart when the dead soldiers coming back start coming to life. Imagine their surprise when one of those men make it to the voting booth, only to vote for the President’s opposing candidate. Murch and the others must now find a way to put a spin on things, but he also has to deal with the secret his mother’s keeping regarding his own brother.

TRIVIA

Directed by Joe Dante of The Howling and Piranha.

Headstones in the cemetery bare the name of prominent zombie movie directors.

Episode 6 during the first season of Masters of Horror.

THOUGHTS

I only have a few more Masters of Horror episodes to get through and then the rest are currently MIA, though I do have the entire series. Homecoming is quite possibly the best episode from that first season, especially for those of us who weren’t the greatest fans of our former President. I actually found myself getting teared up at a scene where a café owner invites in one of the zombies and thanks him for his sacrifice. It reminded me of my uncle breaking down when a high school boy did the same thing, thanking him for what he did in Vietnam. It all goes back to the idea that you might hate the war, but you shouldn’t hate the soldiers. Anyway, Homecoming is a good little zombie movie, but it’s also highly political.

Pretty good.PLOT

Anna returns home after a long day at the hospital and curls up in bed with her husband. That night, a neighbor girl appears and when her husband tries to help the girl, he gets bit and infected. Anna manages to escape and along the way, runs into other survivors who are trying to find the local mall. She joins their group and the gang of them get inside the mall, though the security guards aren’t happy about sharing their space. The group, including a pregnant woman, have to band together to survive and possibly escape with their lives.

TRIVIA

This is one of the movies credited with turning zombies into super fast creatures.

Though James Gunn is given writing credit on the movie, he actually left during the writing phase to work on Scooby Doo 2. How scary is that?

THOUGHTS

I actually really like this movie. The remake of Dawn of the Dead updates the zombie movie genre in a way that brings it into the modern millennium in a good way, unlike some of the zombie movies that came later. It has a high level of blood and some pretty gruesome scenes. I’m thinking zombie baby right off the top of my head. I’ve probably seen this movie a dozen times since it was released in theaters and watching it again, it still holds up pretty damn well.

Bitchin’

PLOT

Ace is heading off to see his favorite band Guitar Wolf play at a concert. Unfortunately aliens land and bring the dead back to life as zombies. He seeks out Guitar Wolf and they go on a journey to kill the zombies, or at least in theory. The movie’s really about a bunch of random scenes thrown together of completely random events like motorcycles racing down the street, naked women, transsexuals and just about anything else you can think of.

TRIVIA

Guitar Wolf is actually a real band that starred in another low budget horror movie from Japan.

THOUGHTS

I only added this movie to my Netflix queue because a guy I was interested in liked it. He’s now gone from the picture so by the time it came in the mail, I didn’t know if I’d even sit down and watch it. I did and it actually wasn’t that bad. Wild Zero is fairly zany (I think that’s an appropriate word for a movie that has a subplot about a love affair between a dorky guy and a transsexual). However it has some off the wall moments that I really liked. I’m surprised this isn’t better known.

Oh. My. God.

PLOT

In a near future Japan, teenage girls are turning into zombies. When they reach the age of 16, they experience a “Near Death Happiness (NDH)” that turns them into killer zombies. A group of other teens form their own mercenary squad, to kill the girls that their families can’t. Another group of people are also killing the teens, while a doctor hopes to find a cure or at least has fun experimenting on the technically dead girls.

TRIVIA

Makes references to both Bruce Campbell and George Romero.

THOUGHTS

It’s been a long time since I saw a horror movie that made me laugh this much, but I couldn’t tell if it was intentional or not. For days after we saw the movie, my friend and I would just look at each other, say NDH and start giggling hysterically. The NDH itself seems like a reference to sex, or at least a first orgasm, but they never identify that for sure. There’s also an irritating subplot about a girl who hasn’t yet turned that just seems to turn up and giggle a whole lot. The ending was ridiculous too and a little creepy or gross if you give it too much thought!

Get the eff out!

PLOT

A creepy grave digger is working in the local cemetery when he’s attacked by a zombie. Apparently this doesn’t phase him as he never tells anyone what happened. Meanwhile the sci-fi club at a local high school are being ridiculed by everyone else and all the president wants to do is date the cheerleader. Another member fights with his girlfriend because he doesn’t take the prom seriously. When the zombies begin attacking the neighborhood, the sci-fi club have to band together with some of their fellow students to save the world…or at least the school.

TRIVIA

Most of the actors in the movie were cast in Georgia, where most of it was filmed and had no movie experience beforehand.

THOUGHTS

I really, really liked Dance of the Dead. The funny thing is that I’ve seen this movie on the store shelves for a couple of months and kept passing it up. When I finally sat down to watch it, I wished I had seen it earlier. I love when a movie can take comedy and horror and mix it together well, which is exactly what happens here. Seriously, where else can you see a zombie frog jump down the science teacher’s throat? That’s the kind of movie you have here.

If you’ve been passing up on this movie, rent it. I liked it so much that I’ll probably end up buying the damn thing since I didn’t have time to watch the commentaries. This was really a great little zombie movie.

Don’t take it too seriously!

PLOT

A chemical gets released into the air and a small town in Nebraska is instantly struck. To stop the spread, a group of soldiers are sent to the secret lab and one is infected, but he manages to escape to an underground strip club before “dying” and infecting some of the regulars. On hand is Jenna Jameson as a seasoned stripper and Robert Englund as the nightclub owner. There’s also the stripper that’s jealous of the other girls and a new God fearing young girl that plans on stripping to pay for an operation. When the zombie strippers start making more money, they girls have to decide if they’re willing to give up the business for good or become zombies themselves.

TRIVIA

Director Jay Lee was also responsible for the horror flick Slaughter.

THOUGHTS

Zombie Strippers is one of those movies that I’ve wanted to see every since I first heard about it, but I only managed to see it this week. I went into the movie knowing that it wasn’t going to be very good, but not really caring either way. I highly recommend that you do the same thing. This movie has some funny scenes and a few gross scenes too. The humor here is very tongue and cheek and you shouldn’t take anything too seriously. If you go in expecting to see a great horror movie, you’re going to be highly disappointed.

I will say that Jenna looks really bad and I do mean really bad. She’s lost so much weight in the last few years that she’s beginning to look sick and that’s very clear here. I know she used to be a drug addict and this movie makes her look like she’s back on them. If you want to see a stick figure with plastic boobs, then pay attention to her stripping scenes. And yes, there are naked women in Zombie Strippers.

This wasn’t the best movie, but it did keep me entertained for most of the film.

Eh…

PLOT

The Vanguard starts out with a history of what happened in the years leading up to 2015. The oil all disappeared, people revolted and the government created a product to calm everyone down. Unfortunately it killed off 75% of the people in the world and the scientists decided to revolt. They created zombie like creatures that attacked and killed many of the survivors. The scientists then turned themselves into the same creatures. We’re then introduced to Max, who just wants to survive though he also has a dark secret that could hurt everyone involved…

TRIVIA

Was first released in Germany.

THOUGHTS

This was another one of my pre-Halloween purchases from Wal-Mart and one that I was really looking forward to seeing. Unfortunately I just didn’t like it. I’ve heard from a lot of people that loved it and they can’t understand what my problem is. I thought the movie was too hard to follow because there were too many characters and back stories introduced. There also wasn’t enough action to keep me happy and entertained.