Horror Queen

Horror movie…or softcore porn?

PLOT

The worst cheerleaders in the world are driving through southern Florida to get to a competition. There’s the slut, the quiet girl, the token guy and the “fat” girl who looks like a regular sized girl shoved in a costume that’s too big. Slut girl goes down on the guy, which causes him to crash into a power line and wreck the car. Unbeknownst to them, a scab eating killer by the name of Andre the Butcher gets his power knocked off and decides to head off on another killing spree. Yeah and there’s something about how he’s going after people who committed sins.

TRIVIA

Also known as Dead Meat.

THOUGHTS

I rented this movie solely for Ron Jeremy, with whom I have a weird perverse fascination with. I find him completely unattractive and pretty much a douche bag, but he’s still fairly interesting. The movie starts and I’m thinking it’s not so bad. Then we get the slutty girl out in the middle of nowhere getting herself off and the quiet girl filming and watching from behind a tree. Aha! So she’s only quiet because she’s a lesbian! Of course! That makes perfect sense! Note my use of the sarcastic exclamation points. Then we get a scene where the two girls flirt over Vienna sausages before finally making out and heading to the bedroom. It just gets worse from there. The acting is bad, the effects are bad and everything is just… bad.

I was watching this with a friend and he completely just passed out 20-25 minutes into the movie. Titled his head back and fell asleep. Not even the thought of lesbian cheerleaders could rouse him. In fact, he looked up, said “lesbian cheerleaders? Not worth it” and went back to sleep. That should probably tell you something.

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